Learning to Let Go

Normally, this is the time of year people are flooded with "OMg its like finalzzz peeps so scared lol" posts.

And this is sort of one of them, but not really.

I'm not really worried about finals this semester. I've already done three, and I only have three left, and only two of those are actual tests. 

No, I'm gearing up to learn a really hard lesson that they can't teach you in a classroom.

I'm learning to let go.

I'm not talking about a relationship, though this lesson has infinite applications.

No, for me, it's my GPA.

I'm not bragging here; I'm stating a fact: these past two and a half years, I've earned a 4.0.

And I'm really scared I'm going to lose it.

I know a B and / or a 3.9 is nothing at all to sneeze at.

And I wouldn't be letting anyone down by getting a B.

Except me.

And that's what I'm struggling to let go of.

I don't want that to be my idol.

I don't want that to bug me.

I want to have peace about it.

And I can.

It's just a struggle.

But it's a good struggle to have.

I mean, at the end of my life, God won't be judging me on my grades.

He'll be judging me on how I lived for Him.

And that's worth so much more thought than a GPA that only matters for four years.

Looking Back . . .

It's hard to believe that about a year ago today I graduated from high school. I went to my friends' graduation today, and every time one of them stood to speak, I could remember - in startling clarity - what it was like to do the same.
The life-lessons I've learned this past year have been somewhat few, I suppose, but by no means insignificant.
The most important thing I've learned is to really take hold of God's promises. He didn't just say nice things to give us stuff to say to each other when we're going through a tough time; He said them so that we could run to Him for comfort.
1 Peter 5:7 says: "Cast all your cares upon Him, for He cares for you".
This has never been more real to me than through the past year. There were times - and there will be times - when I would cry myself to sleep, wondering how the heck I was going to pass a test, a paper, or merely survive the week. I realized that He was just waiting for me to give him my burdens, and then let them be - - at least for the night. [Obviously, I understand that I have to put in some time and effort, too.]
I just can't explain the peace that I would feel. I'm not a touchy-feely kind of person, and I'm not (generally speaking) subject to much emotion, but this was real. The peace of God really does "transcend all understanding".
I guess what I'm trying to say is this: it's been one heckuva long year, but it's really been worth it. I would not trade anything for the closeness that's been brought to my relationship with Jesus because of this year.
To those who are facing freshman year - tackle it head on! And congratulations to the CBCCA Class of 2011!